Allegations of six-figure betting by megastars such as Michael Jordan may astonish most of us, but onetime gamblers like Karen know what it’s like to wager everything from the lunch money to the retirement fund in search of the rush that comes with a Big Win. Yet experts say the money itself is only grease to keep the gambler in play. “The action is really the key to compulsive gamblers,” says Donald Thoms, director of St. Vincent’s North Richmond Gambling Treatment Center in Staten Island, N.Y. “They live by the action. They like living on the edge. It really juices them.”
For most gamblers, a little juice is not dangerous. It’s a cheap night of entertainment for the folks who pump nickels into casino slot machines or gather around a neighbor’s card table for a weekly game. The mark of the problem gambler is the progression from the $5 table to the $50, from $1,000 bets to $100,000, from gambling several hours a week to several hours a day. Problem gamblers convince themselves that, win or lose, it’s no big deal, the next bonanza is just a deal away. “The worst thing for a compulsive gambler is a big win because it keeps him in action,” says psychologist Robert Hunter, who runs a compulsive-gambling program at Charter Hospital in Las Vegas. “I’ve seen a lot of junkies in my time, but I never met one who knew the next fix would cure his addiction.”
Experts still debate whether obsessive gambling is a disease or disorder. But they agree on the symptoms. Emotionally, the gambler turns ornery-tense, irritable, argumentative, or, conversely, withdrawn-particularly while looking for the next game. Winning isn’t much of a respite. “When you’re winning, there’s an enormous rush, but you can’t enjoy it because you have to go out and bet the next day. There is no satisfaction,” said Don R., a suburban New York sales manager. Socially, the gambler is also out of sync, shutting out friends and family. Professionally, work becomes the activity that fills time between bets. And financially, trouble builds, as spending turns into borrowing and borrowing spirals out of control into stealing.
Those obsessed with gambling-past or present-know the power that betting can hold over them. Arnie Wexler, executive director of The Council on Compulsive Gambling of New Jersey, remembers when betting was such a force in his life that “I used to have sex with my wife with the radio on under the pillow, listening to the ball games I was betting on.” His humor belies how he felt in those days. “When I was 30 years old, I lost over $300,000,” says Wexler, 55, who says he hasn’t gambled in 25 years. “I looked to kill myself because I had $5,000 in insurance and a wife and two kids.” The low point came when his wife had a miscarriage and Wexler says he “prayed all the way to the hospital that she would die because it would solve all my problems.”
Can gamblers be cured of their compulsion? Probably not, experts say. The only path to recovery is total abstinence. Even that, experts say, needs to be combined with individual counseling and group programs like Gamblers Anonymous. Still, as Thoms points out, monitoring a onetime bettor is a lot trickier than any other addict, “With drugs or alcohol, there are blood tests or urine tests you can do. With compulsive gamblers you have to rely on a significant person in their life and take their word for it.” A gambler’s track record is not something many a betting man would wager on.
